Day 17: Driving Down the 101 (Part 2)

I started writing this vacation blog for 3 reasons:

1. Reading past travel journals is always fun for me.
2. It helps in retelling the same story over and over.
3. My memory for relevant events (such as the answer to the question of "What did you do for 30 days?") is nearly non existent.

After reading the original post for this day, the third reason above was plainly obvious. Not only was it short and very boring, but it missed nearly every event that went on during the day:

Cliff Climbing in the Morning

Now, I don't want to make this sound like I was solo climbing shear vertical surfaces. These were simply some sandy cliffs that were on the edge of the beach, but they were sandy and steep enough to give me a good hour long workout. Climbing is always a blast because it gives me a reason to travel on all fours like my primitive cousins. Also, most people are too lazy to climb, so I don't have to listen to the other idiot tourists debate the quality of Wendy's over McDonald's while I try to relax.

More Massive Trees

These redwoods are huge. Luckily, every town has a salesman that is trying to attract tourists, so there are places to stop where you can drive through a tree, see a full house made of a tree, eat next to a tree, or set a tree on fire. I only got to experience one of these, with somewhat unappealing results...

Being a Good Samaritan Doesn't Always Pay

There are some things in life you just don't see very often, but when you do, you know something is wrong. Sometimes it is a person with a blue face or a car turned upside down. I never even considered this sight though: Stoners running as fast as their legs would take them with no frisbees to be seen floating through the air. The reason became clear almost immediately: There was a redwood tree stump on fire and their stuff was very near by.

Being the good, upstanding guy that I am (and still a little bitter from the fires that canceled my trip to Yosemite) I decided to stop and try to dump a few bottles worth of water on the flames. After a minute or two of pouring and refilling in a nearby brook, firefighters showed up to save the day and sent us all on our way. Luckily, karma decided to give me a good kick in the crotch while I was trying (poorly, mind you) to be a hero. Another good Samaritan decided that he should park next to my car. Unfortunately, his definition of "next to" was "where the Saab's bumper used to be before he hit it".

What can I say - if this is the worst auto trouble I have this trip, I am a lucky man. No one was hurt, the damage was minor, and the forest is not on fire. I really can't ask for much more.

Finding a Campground

Up until this point, finding a campground has been pretty easy. I've been sleeping hundreds of miles away from anything remotely resembling civilization, so I've had my choice of places to set up my blue floral tent (thanks for that one mom - the girls really dig it). Unfortunately once you get near San Francisco, the campgrounds become more sparse and a little more work is required. One little hint though - always check for campgrounds in the town 10 miles away before you try to drive 2 hours out of the way. Usually you just waste two hours of your life (as I did) although the driving is beautiful.

Ultimately I ended up using GOOG-411 to find the Cloverdale, CA KOA. It was a bit more expensive, but I did get a powered site with running water, free internet and an attendant that gave me a tour of the place on a golf cart in the middle of the night. Don't think that going over a 3 foot drop that you don't see in one of those babies isn't a good time.

So despite a car accident and a two hour detour, it was a nice, relaxing day of driving.


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Up next - Silicon Valley (think processors, not implants)

Day 7: Glacier!

Glacier National Park - All I can say is WOW. Up until two months ago, this peaceful gem wasn't even a blip on my radar. Now it tops my list of places to visit again - leaving Yellowstone, Vegas, Paris and Munich (as a drinker this time) in the proverbial dust.


Oh, Glacier, why do I love thee more than Harp when Liquid A or The Zoo are playing? Let me count the ways.

Emerald Water

At first you don't believe it. Then you accept that it may actually be true. Finally you venture down a rocky path to look, touch and feel the water. It is perfectly transparent with a green/blue tint that no image can truly capture.

Cascading Mountains

One Mountain isn't enough you say? Not even two? How about dozens? It is almost as if a large chunk of frozen water sliced large sections from between the mountain tops, leaving unlimited hiking opportunities with waterfalls, ice caps and various greenery and wildlife in every direction.

Myriad Adventures

Want to blow up a piece of rubber and shoot down the river towards jagged rocks? Rafting is for you. Maybe you want a little more control in a long, narrow fiberglass body? Grab a kayak. Wanna bike? You got it. Jump in 14 passenger tour car? Not my thing, but go for it. Of course, my favorite is hiking. And hike we did. With a view like this at the top, how can you not feel the desire?

The Unknown

The best part of this park is you never know what you'll run in to. We saw black bear and deer, a half burnt forrest and a mountain top weather tower. The best two surprises? One - the lack of obnoxious tourists. Most were calm, quiet and left the animals alone. Two - A hiking log book from over two years ago. Give people a pen, paper and one blank page and they get creative.

I really hope Dylan and Kelly had as much fun as they planned on.

And now a little Q&A for my faithful readers:

1. The Saab. It's a beast. No, it's not going to get the ladies like a Beemer would (I don't really like the snobby, high maintenance, bitchy type anyway). Yes, it has its' quirks, dings and scratches. But guess what. It runs, it goes fast enough, it's getting 30 miles per gallon and it is paid for. I can't ask for much more.


2. The Skirts. Believe it or not, I'm just not trying that hard. There is too much to see, do and experience to have to worry about impressing someone else that I will never talk to again. Maybe that's the point, but any lady I can coerce into the sack in a matter of hours probably has bigger issues than I really want to risk dealing with. So no fist bumps have been shared at this point (If you don't know the story, buy me two beers and I'll spill the beans - it's a good one).

3. The Changing of Plans. Yup, I'm already off my schedule. In this whole trip I have two places I MUST be - on a ferry next Thursday and back to work in mid August. Other than that, it's about kicking back, doing what I want and discovering a country I've seen very little of. I don't think I've stressed once in over a week and am going to try to keep the streak going. If I miss a Sox game or a walk around Seattle, so be it. I'm sure whatever else I end up doing is a lot more fun.

4. The Locks. They're not quite flowing, but are well on the way. The tops of my ears are slowly being covered and my widow's peak is long enough to warrant pushing to one side or another. I haven't shaved in 10 days, so a little stubble is finally showing through. While I can't promise a 70s porn mustache any time soon, I'm well on my way to a crazy mad scientist look by the time I get home.

Keep those comments coming. I'll try to keep the writing entertaining.

Off to Jasper, British Columbia tomorrow....

Day 3: Badlands!

Alright, I was gonna complain about some be-atch at the campground in this blog entry, but these pictures are too great to let me be cranky:


These are all of Badlands National Park in South Dakota. Let me point out that these pics don't do the Badlands justice. It is amazing - my combination of an untrained eye with a simple digital camera couldn't grab how truly awesome it actually is.

First thing tomorrow morning, my bro and I will be hitting it up for a 6.6 mile hike that will require avoidance of rattlesnakes. If you read about 2 men found huddled together and, dead from dehydration due to crying in the Badlands wilderness, feel free to assume that it is the two of us.

Now for a quick run down of the day:

Rollin', Rollin' Rollin'

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521 miles, roughly 7 hours (I LOVE 75 mph Speed Limits)

My Bro's First Sonic Experience

There is a reason that we are all a bit portly. My bros and I love our food.

Windmills/Windfarms throughout Minnesota

I still don't understand why there aren't more of these nation wide. I really think the birds will fly around them and they actually look kind of cool on the horizon.

NPR

NPR is everywhere out here. I have no problem finding a new station once one gets out of range. On top of that, the local shows are actually pretty good. No babbling Diane Rehm to listen to.

Adult Superstores

They are spaced at convenient intervals. Now, I've not found the need to pick up a 12 pack of wild west themed DVDs or novelty gifts for this journey, but I know if I ever need to, they can be found roughly every 100 miles along highway 90.

So despite lots of driving for the third straight day, a PITA owner at the local campground (it rhymes with 'Lad Bands A-OK'*) and smelling like a Motel 8 after an RNC convention, it turned out to be a decent day after all. Hiking and relaxing tomorrow. Yellowstone in 2 days!

*This could also be the motto of MTV program directors in the late 90s/early 00s.

Day 2: Catholic School Girls (this should get my hit count up!)

There is nothing quite like a red bull in the morning. Except maybe 2. Used to chase a latte. A really big latte. After a 4 mile run. And so was the start of Day 2. Despite the long Day 1 and a warm night in the tents, we were back on the road towards Alaska. (Side note: A friend pointed out that green tea is much healthier. I agree, but you try to stock green tea in a cooler meant for beer. Not easy.)


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An hour into the drive, we passed the Hall of Fame that you only thought couldn't exist. That's right - the Recreational Vehicle and Manufactured Housing Hall of Fame. Now, I may have an active imagination, but not even I could make this up. This is an actual 80,000 square foot space dedicated to celebrating "Affordable Housing". I just don't know what else to say - the site says it all.

Just down the road from that gem was South Bend, IN. The home of the College Football Hall of Fame. While I was unaware of this, it did not surprise me all that much. Of course, this was skipped due to time constraints in order to focus on a brief tour of the Notre Dame Campus.


All I can say is "Wow". An absolutely amazing campus. It is clean, the buildings are big and impressive, the history is well known. More importantly, the girls are old enough, repressed enough, smart enough and Catholic enough to make college a lot of fun. I would say that I will be sending my first born son here, but as my brother pointed out, that requires a mate to breed with, and, well, most of us know how that is going (maybe romantic thoughts like that are helping to hold me back...)



After a hair raising 2 hour stop on the Chicago "Express Highway" in which we traveled a total of 20 miles we zoomed west towards the KOA in Rochester, MN. If you are ever in need of such lodging in this beautiful area, I highly recommend the KOA. It has a pool, foosball table, clean bathrooms and WiFi. That's right - the same things that impress a 12 year old impress me. Add boobies to that previous sentence and I think you have it all.

All in all, a stressful, but productive day. 623 total miles in right around 11 hours despite the troubles in Chicago. The extra driving has paid off - we have already knocked a day from the trip which we are using to hike in the Badlands (where we are driving tomorrow). Mmmmmmm...

A couple side notes:
1. I am driving the Saab solo. My bro, his girlfriend and their dog are in the FJCruiser and leading the way. We communicate by walkie talkie to avoid dead spots in the cell coverage. Walkie Talkies are awesome ("Roger that", "ten-four", "over and out", "big dog" and "breaker breaker one nine" have been uttered roughly 723 times in two days.)

2. I know my HTML - I was just lazy. I'll try to remember to make the links pop up in new windows from now on. On that note - HTML is NOT A PROGRAMMING LANGUAGE - it is simply a markup language. If you ever speak with or interview someone who says "I program in HTML" punch them. Hard.

3. Feel free to leave comments - anonymous or otherwise. I'll try to respond to any requests. Also, feel free to share the blog with anyone who might enjoy it. I get quite a kick out of the life I lead, so I might as well share that with others.

Leg 3: Hiking, Highways and Home

Homecoming. A joyous occasion for 90% of high school students. On no other evening can you guarantee pep rallies, bonfires, furry mascots and the loss of virginity (in the classiest of towns, this can all happen simultaneously). While I don't expect all of these in the final leg of my trek, a boy can hope for at least one or two.

This leg of my journey will see me leaving the West Coast hospitality of Robert and Dwight for unknown adventures in the storied west. National parks will be crossed off my list, ballparks will be visited, and the Midwest will have the chance to show that it has more to offer the world then some great beef and a few super consultants.

(Editor's note: Please don't confuse Robert and Dwight for "Robert and Dwight". They both have very nice and attractive female companions. It gives me a lot of hope, because if those two can be so lucky, then I might have a chance too!).

And just as it looks like the last visit has been made, the last trail hiked and the last tank filled, I will visit one of the most perfect towns ever created (even if the fame is unwarranted).

So without further adieu, my final itinerary of the journey...

	Date	Start Location	End Location	Miles	Time	Notes
Day 22	Monday, August 4	Grand Canyon National Park	Zion National Park	254	4:51	A morning hike followed by an afternoon drive. I may need these to help me contain my excitement.
Day 23	Tuesday, August 5	Zion National Park	Denver, CO	634	9:17	Another morning hike and afternoon drive through Bryce Canyon. I might even stop and visit one of the few Dookies (NSFW!) I actually like.
Day 24	Wednesday, August 6	Denver, CO	Kansas City, MO	603	8:45	Batting practice for the Sox in KC.
Day 25	Thursday, August 7	Kansas City, Mo	Knoxville, TN	732	11:13	Might have to get some friends of the road to keep me awake.
Day 26	Friday, August 8	Knoxville, TN	Shenandoah National Park	371	5:56	Drive through Great Smokey Mountains National Park.
Day 27	Saturday, August 9	Shenandoah National Park	Cooperstown, NY	442	7:23	Baseball HOF!!!
Day 28	Sunday, August 10	Cooperstown, NY	Pelham, NH	257	4:32	Home Sweet Home
Day 29	Monday, August 11	Boo	Hoo	0	0:00	Crying as I boot up my machine for the fist time in 28 days

3,300 dusty miles for the finale.

10,500 total miles @ 25mpg = 420 gallons of gas. You can do the math from there.

So those are the plans. Can I stick to them? Will I run out of money? Luck? Patience? Check back for updates, pictures and stories as frequently as I can post them...

Leg 2: Salmon, Coffee and Sushi. America's Left Coast

Ah, the quarter life crisis, a great excuse for middle class, previously spoiled brats to say "Screw it all, I'm outta here!". Do coal miners run into this? Probably not. What can I say? I bitch about life, but I have it pretty well.

This next part of my Tour de North America will let me explore Ketchikan, the "Salmon Capital of the World", ride on several ferries (big boats, not big queens), support a down and out coffee house, gobble down some ebi, and try not to succumb to the allure of the high paying, relaxed pace of west coast life.

Most importantly, I'm going to explore the territory around Vancouver and Seattle. I have spent full weeks of my life trying to conquer these hills in Railroad Tycoon II and screaming "WTF! How is there no gradient in these hills less than an 8?" It's about time I appreciate the real versions of these island riddled lands.

	Date	Start Location	End Location	Miles	Time	Notes
Days 12-13	Friday, July 25 - Saturday, July 26	Metlakatla, AK	Port Hardy, BC	430	~1 day	A great voyage through the British Columbia Inside Passage
Day 14	Sunday, July 27	Port Hardy, BC	Vancouver, BC	289	7:13	A nighttime drive across Vancouver Island
Day 15	Monday, July 28	Vancouver, BC	Seattle, WA	141	2:32	If you don't hear from me for a while, check here or here
Day 16	Tuesday, July 29	Seattle, WA	Oregon Sand Dunes	346	5:56	Ahhh...a night in the dunes. Other than a crack full of sand, can it get much better than this?
Day 17	Wednesday, July 30	Oregon Sand Dunes	Yosemite National Park	658	11:34	Yeah, I'm a little psyched bout this one
Day 18	Thursday, July 31	Yosemite National Park	Yosemite National Park	0	0:00	Hiking Day!!!
Day 19	Friday, August 1	Yosemite National Park	San Mateo, CA	183	3:47	Catching up with my west coast geek baseball buddies
Day 20	Saturday, August 2	San Mateo	San Mateo	0	0:00	APBAPalooza!!!
Day 21	Sunday, August 3	San Mateo, CA	Grand Canyon National Park	787	11:54

All in all, just under 3,000 miles on this leg with a good chunk of those on ferries. Luckily the views are supposed to be great and I'll be able to catch up on some Zzzzzs.

Up Next: Hiking, Highways and Home