Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Day 8: Help Me Colbert - You're My Only Hope*

There aren't a lot of things that can throw me for a complete loop. Must stuff I can take in stride and you'd never even notice me flinch - mostly thanks to the demands of consulting which have transformed my nerves from goo to steel (or at least aluminium, as the Canucks say). Every now and then though, someone will utter a semi-coherent thought that totally surprises me or freaks me out. Off the top of my head, here are a few that I have heard lately:
  • (In a loud whisper)"You're card is being denied"
  • "There is increased bear activity in the campground."
  • "Don't let the dog out since it will attract bears."
  • "Don't wear deodorant, use toothpaste, apply cosmetics or breath, since it will attract bears"
  • "Did I mention the bears in this campground?"
  • "No, our wireless is not working"
As you can guess, a few of those perked my ears and made me clench my sphincter. Luckily the card was just being protected by my bank, and the bears have yet to eat me as of this writing. The final comment was just a horrible thought though. No internet! For a whole day! And no cell service to check my email!? I nearly cried - I'm man enough to admit it. I think a tear or two may have slipped out.

Luckily, a 10 hour drive landed us in Jasper, Alberta, Canada - which the local website assures me is a "gateway to some of the most majestic, pristine and accessible wilderness Canada has to offer".

View Larger Map

As my travel companions and I explored the tourist trap that was main street, I saw my salvation - an internet cafe offering affordable rates and a power outlet. I quickly plopped my rotund rump in a well worn chair and got my high speed fix. All was good in the world.

And it is from this internet cafe that I now write to you - my dozens of loyal readers who seem to take enjoyment in the stew that is my brain. You will all be glad to know that the trip continues and we are aiming for Prince Rupert, BC tomorrow (one day early to take a much needed break from driving).

And what would a post be without pictures:

Some more ridiculously bluish-green water.


The water with its' friend, Mr. Mountain


Big Blue driving towards Big Mountain


That Guy


Beware of humping bears???


Q&A appears to be a popular subject, so send in those questions (trip related, or otherwise). I'll be posting some more answers soon (including a discussion of my grooming habits - Watch Out!).


*You should get at least one of these two geek references. Bonus points for both.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

i'm a geology dunce. what's mr. mountain made of? rock and sand there on the bottom? or is that just smoooooooove rock? (wait, doesn't sand COME from rock anyway?)

please avoid being eaten by bears. thanks.

katherine

John Byun said...

The first advice I received when I became a US citizen was that when traveling abroad, you should tell everyone that you're Canadian.

How about when you're in Canada? I'm sure they'll be able to identify you're a fraud even if you constantly add "eh" and "aboot" while conversing with the locals.

Finally, Chad, if you can get a picture of you humping a bear similar to the picture on the dumpster, you will be my hero. No photoshop! Perhaps you can use Moose as a distraction/bait so you can approach the bear quietly from behind...

Mom said...

Hi Chad,
I am far from being worthy of both sets of points, but isn't Colbert the old way of programming or something to do with programming of computers?
The photos again were awesome but not nearly as awesome as your comical, dry side. I would love to just be a fly on the side of one of your sweet used SAAB seats and hear the banter back and forth of you 2 boys and Janine's laugh!!!! ( I also want to see the real photo that the burning igloo suggested...or is that weird for a mother to ask of her son????? Just remember, I am living in the Skowhegan area...)
A lot of driving huh? I cannot even imagine! I see that GOD even wrote to you - probably because he ate congelaed turkey blood in a broth in Taipei.....!
Lots of love and please drive carefully to all of you!
Mom

John Byun said...

Your mom is awesome. Shame on you for not inviting her along.

Anonymous said...

I heart Chad's mom.